june 27, 2002 - 17:03
morning's odwalla selection: mango tango
afternoon's odwalla selection: carrot juice
just hours from flight, just hours from holiday; jack can smell
liberation. busy bee, the final hours fall away, as he
scrambles through inbox and work queue, putting things to sleep, putting
things away: affording him the opportunity to slide into the ether.
...if only for a moment.
daunting realization: i have been home just two days in the
last three weeks. this holiday will be spent exploring the
northwest.
-
how long does it take to ride along the river to the coast, and up
the coast to the space needle on 8" wheels?
-
is it any faster coming back?
-
how is it to camp on an island, mid-river, in the ambiguous zone between
oregon and washington?
-
what is it like to sleep in your own bed for longer than 4 consecutive nights?
-
what really is the matter with my truck?
-
how hard is it to register a bike for custom yellow or. plates?
-
just what will be made of the 'orange crush' project?
answers to these questions, only now encumbered with hypotheses, to be
defined in short order....
evening's odwalla selection: carrot juice
it is amazing how 'jetset', (the state of being), alters one's motivation:
originally romaticized holidays spent in bright places now fall violently
to the realization that the very *freedom* of joblessness is all that is
really desired in this time away.
june 24, 2002 - 21:11 - technical disappointment
jack sits in dimly illuminated cube on an abandoned floor: although
working to pass the time, he is really running a command center,
desperately waiting for news of a rescue operation that he is orchestrating
800 miles away.
the mission: successful location and extraction of ground personnel, and
heavy equipment. last official sighting was 12 miles past city limits,
in mountain range. groups deployed, scouring mountain side now.
..........
annoyed at AAA. annoyed at poor mobile service on montains.
annoyed that my truck is broken. annoyed at
incompetence of towing agency. annoyed i'm in a different state
and can't do a damn thing. annoyed that i'm still at work.
annoyed at this stupid post.
leaving soon. then food. then shelter.
june 24, 2002 - 11:27 - round and round
morning's odwalla selection: superfood
touch down: sleep two days, drive orange, ride blue, eat, re-launch.
another airport, another state; i'm sleepwalking again.
speaking of, unlike previous engagements, i'm not quite certain where it is
i'm planning on sleeping tonite. too bad there aren't any train
stations here, i could do it euro-style.
...and i had just managed to get all of the sand out of my
pockets from the last beach adventure.
june 21, 2002 - 08:48 (EST)
leaving, on a jet plane
pretty sure i won't be back again
june 18, 2002 - 22:24 (EST) - state of emergency
subject experiences complete regression: hands that were working almost
flawlessly (finally) only two weeks ago have now fallen to lows
previously forgotten but swiftly recalled; several months healing reversed
in just a few days.
jack removes wrist splints, elbow braces, and writes with pencil-end;
originally signing on with plenty of intent, now all consumed with the
promise of hot showers.
(there's no more wait and see)
june 13, 2002 - get me away from here (i'm dying)
eating dinner again at the olive garden tonight... three nights in a
row now.
not that i like the olive garden that much, it's just close to the
hotel, and relatively reliable when it comes to producing palatable food.
that, and i'm in a rush tonite.
in fact, tonite i'm sitting in the smoking section: a relic resigned to
the 'dark' days in california, here it merely proves to be an efficient
way to turbo the wait for a table, circumventing those loitering
in the lobby.
i sit now, quietly in the corner, haplessly distracted by the table
adjacent: 1/2 a dozen latin youth bounce from their seats, excitingly
recounting adventures from last weekend's dance / ball-type event.
(at least, as far as i can tell.. my spanish is far
from perfect.)
there are two distinct accents: 1/2 are undoubtedly mainland spanish,
but the rest speak with cuban inflection, using slang i have only heard in
miami. my hypotheses run from mundane to improbable, trying to
ascertain what has brought them here together, in an olive garden in virginia.
sleeveless shirts, bright colors: hair pulled back into loose pony-tails,
exposing sparkly bits of metal that dangle far from earlobes.
(certainly farther than trendy lengths defined in the bay area).
the youngest (looking) one is smoking.
i'm captivated, watching them; so full of life, so much energy:
it's sexy. was i ever like that?
i would never admit it, but i find myself attracted to the one in black.
she maintains a pose, a candor, a very presence that seems to be
well beyond her years, and stands defiantly above her peers.
posture, prose, perfect. she orders in well accented italian,
and smiles knowingly when the waitress stands there, dumbfounded. it
is clear she comes from monied decent, and is somewhat out her element.
with unwilling acceptance, i suddenly realize the implications of my
situation:
somehow i have found myself, filling a role i never thought i could fall into:
late twenties bachelor, 1000's of miles from home on a buisness trip,
sitting in a restaurant, and thinking fondly of underage girls.
christ.
no, it's not that way. it's about the scene, the
cinematic presence of it all. before me, a table of foreign
syntax laced with familiar semantics: candy for the ears and eyes.
i find myself invigorated anew, a lust for life, one
that i'm not living. this is not jetset as i imagined it
to be.
..........
i'm in a rush tonite, a rush to return to my room. there, i will
retrieve and boot up the Ti, a rush to finally begin to cut a
project i originally shot in january.
in the hasty final moments of last weekend, before flying east, i spent
far too many hours haphazardly ripping image and sound from DV to disk:
raw materials with which /to begin/.
i made it through two tapes, roughly 1/2 of my captured content.
now, 3000 miles away, i must busy myself with the process of whitling
~70 Gb of captured moments into a 3 minute project.
on one hand, it shouldn't be too hard: we never finished shooting...
admittedly, the frustration of this failure is what has kept me from
starting for so long. on the other hand, as i zipped through
all of my captured rushes late into last night, i found a new freedom.
( funny how the very shots i considered 'failures' on the first viewing
are now my favorite captures.. )
time has allowed me to distance myself from original motivation.
now i'm convinced that there is a project here; it's just not
going to be the same one.
june 7, 2002 - 17:31
why can't i face it
am i too blind to see?
everday in everyway
mired in medicrity.
|
tired of continue
there's nothing to rewind.
tomorrow is a pivot
wonder what i'll find?
|
june 7, 2002 - 15:27
morning's odwalla selection: mo beta
man, oh man, do i have a mean case of weekend-itis, mixed with a bout
of the mid-afternoon munchies. (those times when you're not
really hungry, just consumed with the desire to masticate).
or maybe it's just that i'm being bored?
on a lighter note: i just received the casting call for the
annual summertime portland soap box derby on mt. tabor (a local volcanoe).
entrants meeting is tomorrow morning, 8am.
--------------------------------------------------
ENTER THE SOAPBOX DERBY!
Hey Everybody! Drop by Beulahland (118 NE 28th)
on Saturday, June 8 at 3pm for the annual PDX Adult
Soapbox Derby entrant's meeting. You'll learn about
how to enter Portland's funnest summer event, the
rules for racing, and get tips on how to build a car
that won't fall apart 50 feet after the starting line.
[Stop laughing! It wasn't funny!]
See you there!
--------------------------------------------------
guess where i'm going to be?
'fwooooosh!' says jack in his soap
box racer. ;)
june 6, 2002 - 23:01 - how i loathe heat, humidity, bugs.
confirmation in hand, it is clear now that i must head east for work in weeks
to come: previously formless rumours of this trip can no longer be
considered a shallow warning nor an empty threat.
i'm not entirely certain about what i'm supposed to be doing there, and
nobody seems to interested in helping to define these parameters.
in fact, the only thing that i can be certain of regarding the next
two weeks is that i'll be earning every single cent that i receive from the
company for services rendered.
then again, maybe i'll see some lightning bugs. lightning bugs
would admittedly be quite effective at helping to smooth my ruffled feathers.
...but i haven't seen any of those for years.
sitting in the 'good signal' (802.11) corner of the attic, i can't
help but to suddenly feel very old, and very alone tonite.
(time for bed)
june 6, 2002 - 15:29 - in the queue again
time slides by with the venerable elasticity of sand in old bubblegum.
sure it stretches, but slowly, and painfully, and i am sure feel each
element slide past individually.
seconds seem like minutes, and minutes hours. each hour i walk
to the window and stare into the blue; peers inquire why i'm there every
five minutes.
caught, i complacently slide to my cube and begin the cycle anew.
..........
as a new distraction, i have begun to make a small pile of sand, with
errant granules that still cling to last night's connies. it is
small, yes, but could my imagination compensate, could i recreate
the freedom of last night?
a quiet weekend, then a trip i don't want to take. i am haunted
by the question: 'how to while the day when there is nothing to look
forward to?'
..........
- serendipity (1)
- idiom (2)
- dictionary (3)
- paradigm (4)
- liaise (7)
- ubiquitous (5)
- pragmatic (8)
- enquire (10)
- advice (12)
- effect (11)
- jingoism (6)
- foible (9)
- analyse (15)
- affect (16)
- fob (13)
- foray (14)
- gry (20)
- regard (-)
- inform (-)
- surreal (19)
|
random factoid: (infoporn)
a metric that i had not previously considered, but am infinitely
pleased to have stumbled upon: check out the 20 most frequently
submitted queries from the cambridge online dictionariy.
i have been lead to believe that the values in (#) are the rankings from the
previous month.
kind of interesting, huh?
i wonder if google or other online search engines share similiar data:
what is it that the people want to know?
|
.........
hands now cramping from too much typing, (again? it's been so long now),
jack brushes the dirt of his desk and gets up to check the window in his
socks.
june 6, 2002 - 06:59 - sand in my connies
morning's odwalla selection: superfood
hoping for a quiet, inexpensive night, but still craving sushi, jack
succumbs to his desires and finds himself loitering in the street
outside of shogun, yet again.
"i'll just have a quick roll, and an order of
salmon nigiri", he reassures himself (and his pocketbook).
shortly after being seated, the proprietor meets him at his table
with a sake bomb and a grin. "long time
jack, quiet night. will you have drink with me?"
smiling, jack nods yes, but thinks to self: oh boy, here we go...
..........
shortly before getting up to leave, jack signs the bill: somehow the
planned $10 tab has swollen to $40, but he is happy and full and more
than pleased with the evening.
carbon copy in pocket, coat returned to shoulders, jack turns to
the final drink in the queue, cautiously hidden behind ornate glass
and intelligently left until after the bill was settled.
sake meets beer, stein meets lips, and the confrontation is quickly
resolved, leaving jack to waddle out of the establishment, truly
contemplating if there was any way he might add anything to
his super-full belly.
head swims with drink, and the eyes play lightshows with the neon
marquee of the theater opposite. definately a good night for
a walk.
ultimately, jack finds himself at cowell's beach, spinning in circles
on the sand whilst staring at stars. mobile clamped tightly to
ear, he listens to the tinny sound of music stored via voicemail,
his own private library.
certainly not as satiating as the real thing, but in a pinch it has
to do, and he (beep, beep) plays back until there's no juice left to
transmit or receive; cast as such into new solitude, he finally
falls quiet and still.
the night is crystal clear, and dimly illuminated by boardwalk lights,
casual froth at waters edge shows the sea gently lapping the shore.
the sound of boat rigging tapping in time with the tide soothes
him to no end.
first with affirmation, "i want to sail around the world."
then with resignation, "i want to sleep on sailboat."
.........
in the end, i guess the shore was sufficient: jack wakes with an
ear full of sand, and a body invigorated by fresh air.
admittedly, not the most ideal of sleeping arrangements, but it's
amazing how complying the body is when the correct negotiation measures
are employed. perhaps his next trip to the ocean will be
accompanied by a tent. ...or, ideally, a boat.
a santa cruz 52' would do quite nicely...
june 5, 2002 - 08:12 - my machines talk to me
morning's odwalla selection: mango tango
body demanded, mind complied: jack slept for 9 solid hours last night,
curled tightly around a hunk of blue-glowing metal that whirred and
clicked away as it pulled soundbits for another day out of the dusty
attic air.
screw XP: this is a world w/o wires. ;)
with sunrise, a new day, a new vitality, a new love.
(it's hard not to skip out of bed when you wake to such svelte form.)
then again, it's hard not to stay in bed, touching her buttons.
june 4, 2002 - 13:35
previously miserable day brilliantly illuminated by the arrival of nondescript
box containing an entirely new element for jack's little chem lab of life...
Ti
titanium |
| atomic number: |
22 |
| atomic symbol: |
Ti |
| atomic weight: |
47.90 |
| Electron Configuration |
[Ar]4s^23d^2 |
|
Properties
Titanium, when pure, is a lustrous, white metal. It has a low density, good strength, is easily fabricated, and has excellent corrosion resistance. It is ductile only when it is free of oxygen. The metal, which burns in air, is the only element that burns in nitrogen.
Titanium metal is considered to be physiologically inert. When pure, titanium dioxide is relatively clear and has an extremely high index of refraction with an optical dispersion higher than diamond.
Isotopes
Natural titanium consists of five isotopes with atomic masses from 46 to 50. All are stable. Eight other unstable isotopes are known.
Uses
Titanium is important as an alloying agent with aluminum, molybdenum, manganese, iron, and other metals. Alloys of titanium are principally used for aircraft and missiles where lightweight strength and ability to withstand extremes of temperature are important.
Titanium is as strong as steel, but 45% lighter. It is 60% heavier than aluminum, but twice as strong.
The aesthetic (sex appeal) of Titanium in it's pure, white lustrous form
can be especially noted in it's recent employ by Apple Computer to encase
the internals of the new PowerBook g4, of the same name. Although
originally selected for it's lightweight but tensile properties, this
application of the element could be the cornerstone for an entirely new design
methodology.
june 4, 2002 - 10:55
jack sits in cube, stares at clock, wonders to self 'where has the weekend
gone?'
heavy handed news waits in duplicate, lurking in both inbox and voicemail
queue; small indicators of the long month ahead.
( more )
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